two beer lunch

so, i met this guy when i first got back to the area through a friend of a friend.  he basically has been begging to go out with me for a year, and in the last 6 months become a big reader of one of my blogs (obviously not this one) and continues to pursue. 

a few weeks ago he asks me if i have a day available for lunch…and i say “sure, why not?  how about monday?”  and he says “mondays can be tricky for me, but i’ll do my best.”

monday came around and i texted him around 9am “where do you want to grab lunch?”  and he writes back “i have a call in maryland around 1pm today, is there another day that is good?”  and i reply “wednesday 145ish will work for me.”  and he replies “awesome.” 

no big deal. 

on wednesday i text him around 9am “is today still good?  where do you want to go?” 

he replies “today is great.  where do you want to go?”

i say “i’d prefer to stay restonish.  how about on the border?  paolo’s?  macaroni grill?”

he writes back “on the border, 145.”

cool.

at 147 i text him “i’m at the light at reston pkwy and temporary, sorry i’m late, i’ll be there in a minute.”

he calls and says “i just got off the toll road, i’m on reston parkway, i’m right behind you.  grab a table and order me a tecate.” 

ok.  done.

so, i’m at a table in the bar.  watching the olympic ping pong match and sipping on my unsweet tea. 

at 2 he calls me and says “i don’t see you.” 

this guy is 6′5″ish and i look around and say “i don’t see you either.”

and he says “oh my god, i’m at rio!  i can’t believe it.  i’m on my way, i’m really sorry.”

he picked the restaurant and went to the wrong one.  ok ok ok.  he’s probably stressed, nervous, who knows.

215 he finally shows.  he is markedly frustrated with himself and i reassure him that i’m not mad, i’m not in any hurry, so no big deal.

he sits down, picks up a menu and says “how does this work?” and drops it back down on the table.

hmmm.  this should be interesting.  i smile and  say “well, lunch specials are here, if that is what you mean.”

surely he’s encountered a menu before, right?

well, then he says “i’m so flustered, i’m not going to order, i’m not even hungry.”

and i say “well, it is 215, and i’ve barely eaten all day, so i’m eating.”

i order tacos, he orders another beer. 

conversation is strained, he does most of the talking as i try to gracefully eat the worst food item to order on a date.  i have food falling out one end of the taco as he sips on his beer, and i don’t care.  i’m not going out with him again, i mean, come on.

well, he has to be somewhere at 4, so it is a clean exit, i pull out my card to pay, and he doesn’t let me.  he pays for my lunch and apologizes again for being late.  that was nice.  i’m pretty sure he knows it hasn’t gone well, because he kinda surrenders to his car.

first dates are interviews.  you don’t wear a dirty shirt, you try and put your best foot forward, you try to impress.  i was always told to mimic the person who is interviewing you:  handshake, volume, body language….all of it.  well, he not eating, that just made me feel awkward.  it was a “lunch date” so, order an appetizer or something, don’t eat it, and save it for later. 

and i’m late for almost everything….but never for interviews, work or first dates.

***thanks to T for the name on this one.

one of the mikes

yes, based on that title, you could assume that there are more than one suitor named “mike.” and you’d be right.

we met after a comedy show.  friend of a few friends.  seems like a cool guy.  went to a bar after the show with a bunch of other people and honestly didn’t talk to him that much.  he asked me if i was on a social networking site and i said “yes” and then he asked me for my url.  i told him i didn’t know it.  silly me, i’m used to guys asking for my number.

anyway, by the time i got home i was “friend requested” by him and accepted.  i didn’t write him a note and the next day, he remarked on that.  well, we chat back and forth.  he is funny, charming and nice.

he lives in baltimore somewhere…..northish.  over an hour away.  well, two dear friends of mine live up there too and invited me to their baby shower.  so i ask one of the mikes if he wants to grab a cup of coffee (he doesn’t drink alcohol) and he agrees.  we pick a starbucks and enjoy some java.  we have a good time….a great time.  he isn’t guarded or cynical like a lot of guys i’ve gone out with and it is refreshing to hang out with someone who isn’t going to drink my beer.  we had coffee for 2 hours.  and i felt comfortable being myself around him.  he revealed a bit of himself to me.  and i think he would be a great guy to be involved with.

well, dude puts me as his number 5 friend out of 8 on his site.  really?  that seems a little weird.  he has 1500 “friends” on there.

so, problem?  he is friends with bob the builder.  they’ve known each other for years.  i can’t really do that.  i don’t feel good about dating more than one cheerleader on a squad.  so, honestly, things will probably go nowheresville with him.  which is unfortunate, because he is a stand up guy.

i saw him again this past weekend, had a beer with him after visiting my friends and their new baby.  it was nice, he had a coke and few cigarettes and i drank a beer.  i told him i was tired and gonna go home and he said i could stay there, if i want.  i politely declined.

one of the mikes is a guy who calls me at 1230am to chat about his week.  really…just to chat.  i’m up everyday at 530am so that is kinda shitty for me.  but, overall, honestly, it comes down to his relationship with bob the builder.  he is pretty awesome, but i don’t see anything materializing from our encounters.

veggie burger salad

veggie burger salad is a great guy.  i would have any of my friends date him.  he is handsome, honest, funny and down to earth.  but he’s looking for a mate, a “forever” person, and unfortunately all he got was me.

i knew him when i was younger and he found me on a social networking site and when i moved back to dc i was starved for company.  i needed to be distracted.  the divorce was draining and it was nice to be around someone who never knew my ex.  i was honest with him though, that i wasn’t looking for anything serious and i told him that “if you want a girlfriend, you should find some one else.” 

after being in a relationship for 7 years, i’ve forgotten how to “casually date.” so i can’t fault the guy for having expectations, when i would do things a girlfriend does like make him dinner and be completely comfortable chilling on his couch and wearing sweats around his place.

he eats mostly vegetables and, occasionally, some chicken.  i made him chicken stuffed with rosemary, garlic and olive oil, asparagus and garlic bread.  a pretty  nice meal.  we had that and a bottle of wine and i was a happy girl. 

i was a vegetarian for four years, i can appreciate it, i can do it.  but, i love cheeseburgers, bacon, ribs, and very few things make my world turn like a yummy steak cooked med rare. 

he decided he was going to make me dinner.  he was very excited.  there was wine, i was sitting on the couch in anticipation and he brings out my plate.  “i made my famous veggie burger salad for you” he said. 

famous, eh?  let me tell you what is involved in this.  romaine lettuce, some cherry tomatoes, some avocado (which i am allergic to), some green peppers and a veggie burger patty that he had put in the microwave and crumbled on top.

then he says “the only thing that is wrong is that i don’t have any dressing, but i mix olive oil and tabasco sauce and it is really good.” and i say “i don’t use much salad dressing.” 

“the only thing that is wrong.”

so, we eat.  and it isn’t bad, really it isn’t.  but i have a harder time getting past the presentation and possible histories behind the veggie burger salad. 

the next time we meet for a beer, he uses “girl i’m dating” to describe me and i cut him loose.

i’m not ready for “dating” and i’m not ready for veggie burger salad.